Behind The Scenes

Most of the friends I've made since I've been married will be surprised to know that my family wondered if I would ever shut up. I can talk forever. I need to talk in order to think through things clearly. That means that I don't always mean the first thing that comes out of my mouth. But I knew that if I was driving my family crazy then my friends probably got sick of hearing me too. So I have learned to talk less. Some might say I still talk too much. And I certainly still say many things I wish I hadn't. I'll likely type many things I don't mean and wish I hadn't too. But I'll try to save and edit sometimes instead of just virtually blurting out whatever is in my head. The point is that those who read will either have to overlook these shortcomings or read something else on the web. There are many more prolific writers than I am.
Anyway, in my efforts to talk less I have acquired a bad habit of having conversations in my head and I'm not always sure which ones are real and which ones aren't. My husband is gone a lot so most of my imaginary conversations happen with him and then there is this cycle of frustration where he says I never said something that I remember saying to him! And then if we are actually together I'll sometimes start a conversation in my head and then switch to out loud in the middle. This happened on our latest road trip. And as we were both laughing at me he said, "I know there is a lot going on behind the scenes, but that was a little too much even for me!" He meant that he could usually figure out what I was talking about even when I bring him in in the middle. I enjoyed the description of my thinking and so that is the title of this blog. If anyone ever reads this feel free to comment. I'm used to having conversations with myself, but it might be nice to hear from others sometimes!